Not my Favorite Solstice

 

I am not a very good pagan.  In fact, I'm not sure I'm pagan at all.  Like every other term in the orbit of human religion, "pagan" has been co-opted by a subset of believers in a particular non-mosaic religious dogma; rather than referring to "a [any] person holding religious beliefs other than those of the main world religions," as pagan is defined in the Oxford dictionary.  

Nowhere is my lack of dutiful paganism more apparent than in my observance of solstice.  I'm all about the Winter Solstice.  I have my fire, I chant and sing, I symbolically burn the things that no longer serve.  Winter Solstice makes sense to me, it appeals to me to have a celebration right in the middle of my favorite time of year.  That I'm supposed to be celebrating the "return of the light" seems entirely beside the point.  I'm actually reveling in the starkness and darkness of the time of year that best speaks to my stage of life.    

I'm generally not in the mood to celebrate the summer solstice.  Summer lost its appeal for me a long time ago.  When I was immersed in a seasonal business, I was too busy during the summer to pay attention to much else.  Now that I'm semi-retired, summer is a time of year that is too hot, too fast, too noisy and too social for me.  

This year, our region of Oregon has had a wet, cold, depressing spring.  Every morning I get up and look at my weather app (I really should delete that thing, for all the good it is), and it either promises rain and unsettled weather, or it hints at a less than 50% chance of precipitation that gets quickly drowned in the quixotic reality of Oregon meteorology. Oddly enough, today--this year's Summer Solstice in the Willamette Valley--is the first day we've had unfettered sun in...it seems like months.  I suppose I should be grateful, and hopeful that today is a sign of better weather to come...but I'm just...meh.

What's to look forward to besides the constant crack of legal and illegal fireworks throughout the neighborhood between now and the end of August?  Or the stagnant heat that keeps me from getting a decent night's sleep?  Or needing to stay far away from any of Oregon's more beautiful natural areas, because this time of year they are crawling with tourists?  Or neighbors throwing noisy parties that might as well be right in my own back yard, in this environment of squished-together houses with tiny yards? Or being unable to enjoy the back yard on a summer evening without being beset by a horde of ravenous mosquitoes? I can think of SO many reasons that the thought of summer just leaves me cold.  Or wishing it WAS cold, anyway.

Be all that as it may, I'll wish all a Happy Solstice. Enjoy the summer, if that's what you're into.  Me?  I'll just put my head down and charge through it, until I can get to the time of year I really like.