Wednesday, October 8, 2003

Lousy Morning

God, I feel like crap this morning.  Woke up with a crick in my back just below my shoulder blade.  Makes it really pleasant to even move, much less think about going to the pool.  But go to the pool I will.

My life has become a showcase for how the differences between men and women can make a wife miserable.  Now, we've been married nearly 27 years, and I couldn't imagine my life without him...but sometimes I get fed up with this "men and women are just different" thing.  I've heard all the blather about how cultural, hormonal, and basic physiological differences make men and women see the world in vastly different ways.  And I even believe it.  But in pratice, you would think that two people who have spent 27 years in the same house could have made it to some common ground in between.

It's my misfortune that I have never had women friends, and I expect my husband to fill my need for human connection.  There was a time in our lives that I thought this was actually happening...unfortunately, lately he's given up even trying on that score. I'm wondering why, even while I'm reading articles on how we women just need to GET the differences between our husbands and ourselves.  Okay...then why can't he GET the differences between our views on sex?  It's pretty classic...I want the romance, the emotional connection, and he looks on sex as some kind of purgative calisthenics called for as soon as we hit the sheets at night.  No matter if we've been sitting in front of the tv for 3 hours and he's hardly said five words to me since he got home from work.  He doesn't understand why I can't turn desire on and off like a light-bulb.

The result of all this is, well, he's not getting everything he wants, and I'm not getting everything I want.  And maybe it's the hallmark of a good marriage--that we hang in there and keep trying.  We each know we'll get lucky once in awhile...

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